Molly + Nate does not = the same child (and that's ok)

Funny how different two kids can be. From one set of parents to another, yes it makes sense. But when the same two people keep having kids, it amazes me that they can be so different from each other.

Before we had Cash, Nathan and I had no idea what a little person that we created would be like. Would he have Dad's sense of humor and Mom's clearly superior looks? (Just kidding...) Would he be level-headed like Dad ("it is what it is"), or an emotional trainwreck like Mom (what do you MEAN you ate my Peanut Butter Cups!??)? Based on the printout that we got from Dave and Buster's when we put our two pictures together, our child was going to be doomed in the looks department.

What we got (the first time around) was a sweet, good-looking, and hilariously funny little boy (who definitely falls in the 'emotional' category, like Mom). His likes range from entertaining people, trying new foods, going to the store (especially when we all go), and gardening with Grandma. He dislikes S'mores when they are actually assembled, the part in All Dogs Go To Heaven where he realized that the little girl didn't have any parents (he sobbed over that one), and when the pink bear in Toy Story 3 yells at the other toys.  Other than that I've had a hard time coming up with things he dislikes. He's pretty easy-going like Dad, but emotional like Mom.

When Nathan and I wondered what our second child would be like, we imagined this child to be exactly like Cash. We don't have much imagination, so we just figured Molly + Nathan = a child like Cash.

Then along comes Declan. My more independent child. Sweet, loving, and also funny. Those are traits Cash has as well, so how can they be so different?! Declan has been independent from the moment he stopped breast-feeding at 6 months. I cried because he simply wouldn't do it anymore. No amount of coercion could convince him to be dependent on Mommy any longer. He's such a good little boy, but man, does he try my patience. Everything has to be done on his own and done the hard way.  He rarely wants help unless it's to read to him. He has very selective hearing (mostly when Mom is asking him to do something he doesn't want to do). And he's a tester. Where are the boundaries? How high will Mom count? Will she really stop at 3? What if I just go stand by the shoes but don't actually get them like Dad asked? Does Cash like it when I sit on his back in the bathtub and and pretend he's a horse (totally not kidding on that one)? I know it's all part of growing and and especially being 2, but Cash never really went through this phase (or it's just a difference in personalities) so it's been strange getting used to it.

He can be trying, but he's also very sweet. He is very smart and picks up puzzles and songs very quickly. He loves to tell jokes like Cash does, but it mostly consists of, "Knock knock" <who's there?> "ummmm...bro-bro" <bro-bro who?> "ummm.... Mama"  so we are still working on that. :)  And in the morning, and sometimes at night, he'll still snuggle with me. I cherish those moments and try to file away the memory under, "They'll never be this little again."

This doesn't even skim the surface of their different personalities. But no matter what they are like, Nathan and I are so proud of each of them. They are sweet, funny, well-mannered, smart, and they're ours.

In honor of Declan being such a little independent person, here are some shots of his newly acquired mohawk. And a silly one of Cash earning money by taking the cans back to Meijer.

Wiping off the dust

FFPHHEEEWWWW....  (That's me blowing the dust off this long-forgotten about blog.)

I'm tired of getting guilt-tripped by Katie (although she's really only reminding me of the guilt that I'm already feeling) about how I haven't written a blog post since NOVEMBER. I can tell you exactly why I didn't go back to writing, but mostly it would just be an excuse.

About a week after my last post, a friend of mine killed himself. More specifically, my best friend's husband killed himself.  So tragic, and for awhile I thought to myself that my blog seemed so trivial compared to what my friend is going through. How can I write about how happy my life is and how I feel so lucky when her life has now been turned upside down and her two-year old is now without her daddy? There's nothing to say, not much to do. and the fact that she lives 600 miles away just did not help the situation (in terms of me helping her). I wanted to write a post for him, and I started to a few times, but I could never get it right.

So I put it off... and off.. until I really recognized that my boys aren't getting any younger. In fact, every day they do something new and it amazes me. They make me laugh, and sometimes make me want to bang my head against a wall, but mostly they do the cutest little things that I don't want to forget. So here I go again... Blog, round 2.

Below is a picture of my aforementioned friend (to the right of Nathan) that was taken at Nathan's 30th birthday party. Sadly, the friend on the left also killed himself a few months after the picture was taken. Add that to my mother killing herself almost two years ago, and this is becoming a real downer of a blog.

Despite the conflicted emotions that come with looking at this picture, I still love it. What a great weekend that was. What sweet memories we have of our loved ones. Don, and Bill, and Mom... you are missed more than you know. So much is happening to the ones you've left behind, and you are missing it all. But as we move forward, and our kids get older, we'll cherish our memories and the times that we had together. Well, most of them. There are a few with my mother I'd rather forget, but what can you do?

womp, WomP WOMP....

And now...  on to happier (and mostly completely random) posts.

Thanksgiving 2011

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. My boys are 3 years old and 20 months. While getting jammies on, I was asking Cash what we are thankful for. Earlier he replied with answers such as "Cheez-Its" "pretzels" and "peanut butter crackers" thus fully demonstrating the very here and now thoughts of a 3 year old.

So while getting on jammies, he said he couldn't think of anything (basically he doesn't understand the concept of Thanksgiving - hence why we were talking about it!). So I said, "Remember when talked about it earlier? When you named all those foods that we have and we are so thankful that we have food to eat? We are so lucky that we never go hungry. Cash, did you know that there are some people who don't have very much food? Sometimes there are kids that are hungry." And he got very concerned, obviously really thinking about that.  Then he said, "But maybe we can share!"  Cue Mom's tears. What a simple response. What a simple answer. And to a 3 year old, there is nothing complicated about it. I am such a proud mommy.

We talked a little more about it and he got more and more excited saying, "We can share, Mommy! There are some kids, and they don't have any food, and they are hungry, and we'll say, 'here's some food!' and then they won't be hungry!"

The thing is, we're broke. I always feel like we are broke. Never enough money. Too many bills to pay (DAMN IT, why did we go to college!?  j/k)  And with being somewhat jobless as of late, it's gotten worse and worse.  Like many families in America, I have to set a tight food budget, plan meals with the idea the leftovers will be lunch (not always a bad thing!), and we sometimes have cereal for dinner. But seriously. If we can still afford pop, cookie dough, or order in a pizza, we can't be doing too bad.

So now I am on the hunt for a food pantry so we can go pick out some canned goods (at the store, not the food pantry), drop them off and show Cash how we can help. Even if we'll be eating cereal that night.

Counting my blessings and running out of fingers and toes!

It's that time of year. The holidays are coming up. Snow has covered the ground (and disappeared all in the same day!). And I personally think that everyone has done a GREAT job not focusing on Christmas until we are done with Thanksgiving!

It seems to be a popular thing where everyone is posting 30 days of thankfulness on Facebook. This is actually a refreshing change from people bitching and moaning! I didn't get on the 30 day posting bandwagon, but at least I can write it here, and then anyone who feels so inclined can read it here!

I'm thankful for:
-My sweet little boys, Cash and Declan. They are (as I tell them daily) my whole world.  They light up my life, drive me crazy, and make my heart feel better all at the same time.
-My wonderful husband, Nathan. He is my best friend. He makes me laugh, occasionally makes me cry, and is always there to kick my butt out of self-pity when I am down.
-Nathan's very stable job which allows me to have a flexible schedule in working, thus also allowing me to have time to take care of our household, make doctor's apointments, and cook.
-My KS family, who I don't get to see near enough. Especially thankful when they make the time and effort to come visit me in MI.  I can't wait to hold a Christmas in July when we have our next house and all members of my KS family will be expected to be there!
-My MI family, who I still don't get to see near enough. :)  I have the best in-laws a person could ask for, and so much support for my boys. Especially grandma.
-Our FL family, who we REALLY don't get to see near enough. But the boys love their Papa and Grandma Letta (and sometimes if we are lucky, Auntie Erica!) so much, and we take advantage of our time when we do get the opportunity to visit!
-The second mother of our household, Andrea. She is our daycare provider and I don't know what we would do without her and her loving family! They are so good to our boys and we never worry when they are with her!!
-My girlfriends, of which I have many. They understand. They let me vent without too much judging. And they make me laugh. Alot.
-All my non-parent parents. Ricky and Tricia. DeAnn and Bruce. My Kroc mom, April. I'm very blessed to many parental figures in my life, even though I'm in my thirties.
-To have two working cars that don't have car payments. *knock on wood*
-Deans French Onion Dip, Dr. Pepper, Reeces Peanut Butter Cups, and Jet's 8 corner pizza.
-The opportunity to work in a fitness center, which keeps me working out on a semi-regular basis, and provides a great place to train for 5ks, and triathlons.
-Facebook. Such a silly thing to be thankful for, but I get to keep in touch with family, with friends, share pictures, and stalk people.
-Dave Ramsey. Is this a silly thing to be thankful for?  Well, going through his 13 week course really put our financial situation into perspective, and made us set realistic goals so we can be debt-free and have a great retirement!

What else?? So many things. I am very blessed. I make sure to tell my boys (all 3 of them) every day how much I love them. I'm going to make sure that as my children grow up, they are always thankful for the things that we have. That might not be alot when it comes to cool toys, or nice cars, or expensive vacations, but we have so much more than that. And I am thankful.

The things we're teaching.

Parenting is a big responsibility. There is this little person (or two) that you are in charge of. You are supposed to teach them all the do's and don't's of life. The things that are appropriate... or not. Oh, and don't get me started on manners. If you aren't teaching your children manners and how to be polite, and respect others, then SHAME ON YOU. Don't even get me started.

Here's the thing, though. Having small children is also an opportunity to teach them how to have fun, how to be silly, and with that: how to be creative.  And sometimes you just can't help but show them the things that make life fun, even if they aren't always the most appropriate. Here are some things we do in our household to have fun.

Dipping: one of the first thing that parents show children while thinking, "I know I'm going to regret this at every meal after this."  There is nothing more magical to a toddler than dipping. Whether it's pancakes into syrup sausage into orange juice, hot dogs into ketchup carrot sticks into soup, or chicken nuggets into ranch green beans into yogurt, dipping.is.fun.

Snuggling: not that snuggling is bad. Not at all. Forget about that 1% of you (well, me at least) that appreciates a sick kid when they wouldn't snuggle with you otherwise.  Or when you sacrifice watching adult TV and suffer through a.n.o.t.h.e.r. episode of Caillou (yech!) in exchange for two snuggling boys. Oh, and then there was last night, when Cash got out of bed, came to my room where I was reading, and said, "Mommy, I want to snuggle with you."  I didn't care that it was 10:00 at night. I said, "Come on up, Monkey." And prayed we weren't starting a bad habit.

Bodily noises: seriously. You can't live with two little boys and not laugh when they look surprised after a fart, smile at you after a burp, or giggle while making themselves sneeze just so YOU will laugh (true story: Declan somehow made himself sneeze about 15 times). Or the best is when Nathan or I fart (gasp!) and look at the boys and THEY say, "'Scuse me."  HAHAHA!  Funny kiddos.

A few other honorable mentions: Nathan showing them how to put the couch pillows on the floor and jump off the couch onto them (while I was at work!), giving them a snack right before dinner... so I can make dinner, and getting our clothes all wet from playing in puddles - it's just water, people! Clothes will dry.

I know there are many more things, and maybe even a few I wouldn't want to publicly admit on my blog (but will gladly share with you after a glass of wine). But overall, I am very content and happy that we are raising two VERY polite, very sweet, and uber-hilarious children.

The things I don't want to forget.

I love watching my get bigger and smarter and funnier. The things that come out of their mouths amaze me. Especially when Cash dropped the s-bomb after spilling cold water on himself (at least he used it correctly!) and the time he said, "damn it!" all day at daycare. Which, by the way, my daycare lady's husband thought was hilarious. We thought it was funny too, but obviously had to nip in the bud!  Recently we've had two funny stories that I want to remember, so I'll document them while also keeping you amused for a few minutes.

Nathan is currently in New Jersey for a training, and so I have the boys on my own for a few days. We had to go run some errands on Sunday (he had already left town) so I told Cash that we had to leave in a little while to go run some errands. He said that he didn't want to go, and that I could go, and he would watch Declan. I said, "You are going to babysit?" and he said, "No I'll just watch him."  I told him that was very sweet but that this time they could just both go with me. Then I sweetened the deal with Apple Dippers from McDonalds (which was selfish because I really just wanted a Coke).  We still had some free coupons for the Apple Dippers so we wouldn't want them to go to waste!

Then today we were on our way to daycare and at a stoplight.  There is a gas station at that light, and then a liquor store across the street.  We've been at that stoplight hundreds of time, so he know that is where Daddy gets beer (which is funny because Nate has actually NEVER shopped there). So here is how that conversation went:

Cash: Look, Mommy! There's Daddy's beer truck!
Me:  Yup, that one's called Miller Lite.
C: What's that man doing?
M: He's taking the beer inside to the store.
C: Maybe Daddy can get beer from the beer truck.
M: Nope, the truck takes it to the store and then Daddy has to go to the store to get it. He can't get it from the truck. But sometimes if we go to a nice restaurant he can get it there. Not like McDonalds, though.
C: Yea, McDonalds is mean.
M: What?
C: McDonalds is mean.

I then spend  5 seconds trying to figure out what he's talking about when I realize that I said we had to go to a NICE restaurant (as opposed to a mean one). I started laughing and then spent the next few minutes trying to explain 'fancy' to him. 

Too funny. That kid cracks my shit up. Oops - I guess we know where he gets the swear words...

The joys of potty training.

My whole life right now revolves around peeing and pooping. No joke. Although I've gotten hear so many people brag about their early potty trainers ("She was fully trained by two!" "He watched his older brother and was trained by 18 months" "She walked out of my uterus and said, "Mommy, I have to go!""), my almost-three-year-old was apparently a slacker. He just showed no interest. So I wasn't going to push it, although spending $40 a month on diapers (times two kids!) was really starting to get on my nerves.

I started prepping Cash about a month before his third birthday. When someone would ask him how old he was going to be on his birthday, his answer became a robotic, "Three, and we don't wear diapers when we're three." This always got a laugh, but underneath it was serious tone.

About two weeks after we started this mantra,  we took a weekend to begin. Off with the diaper, on with the big boy underwear (forget superheroes and dinosaurs, he has to have underwear that looks like Daddy's!), and in with the fluids. He went pee 7 times that day! Woohoo! Stickers and candy all around! From then on, he was pee-trained. 

Now comes the hard part (literally... ew!). Pooping. For some reason little kids are afraid to poop on the potty. I'm not sure if it's the new sensation (lack of sitting in your own $hi+??) or the actual poop itself (apparently some kids think it's going to "get them!") but he began to hold it. And hold it. And hold it. Anyone who's ever been constipated can relate. Poor little dude. Cue increase of non-diluted apple juice, decrease in bananas, and a pooping prize-box.

*side note - I did have an episode last night with a floater in the tub. Good news was I got him out in time to finish on the potty. Poor Declan - he did NOT look happy about the extra bath toy in his bath (they were bathing together!).
I think I can (knock on wood) say that Cash is now OFFICIALLY potty trained. And 95% of it was by his 3rd birthday.  Thanks to the grandparents buying lots of new undies for him, we now got a $40 a month raise! Go Cashy!